Saturday, March 3, 2012

Personal Princess Placements

Recently I have been involved in quite a few discussions on the extremely important topic of .....

Disney Princesses

Ok, maybe not too important, BUT I actually am very opinionated on this subject (like I am with most things) and so I thought, "Where better to put my opinions down in writing than on my blog!" So here are my personal rankings and reasons behind each one of the official Disney Princesses:

#10-Snow White (Sidenote: This is only for Disney's interpretation; not for 'Once Upon a Time')
First off: her voice.... I don't understand how a human being can talk like that for extended periods of time, but it is CRAZY annoying and sort of freaky. Secondly, her story line: she goes off into the woods with a stranger (who tries to kill her), talks to animals who don't talk back, goes into someones house without permission and then proceeds to clean it (which I'm pretty sure is illegal), then accepts an apple from a creepy old lady (which does kill her), and then after being reawakened runs off with her Prince who she has literally spent five minutes with and has never had a real conversation with. All of this is stupid to me and I see no moral taught by her, except for if you are pretty and can clean and cook, seven men will let you live with them.

One time when I was eight or nine we went to Disneyland and they had a character quiz to tell you which Disney character you were most like...... mine was Maleficent. So I'm pretty sure I'm destined to not like Sleeping Beauty much.
Reasons why I don't like her: She talks to animals that don't talk back (in other Disney movies the animals talk, which is weird, but makes it seem less crazy that the people are talking to them). She falls for the pick-up line "We have met before, you said so yourself: 'Once upon a Dream'" which I find super creepy. She pricks the spinning wheel! Why?!?!?!?! I don't get it. And she is saved by a kiss, which I just don't like.
Reason why I do like her: She is inspired by Audrey Hepburn. She walks around barefoot singing to herself. And she grew up in a cottage with three old ladies! (Kind of jealous)

The only reason that she ranks higher that Aurora is because the animals she talks to talk back (for some reason this really matters to me) But other than that I don't like her too much. She does clean quite a bit, and as a bit of a neat-freak I do appreciate that. However, her Fairy Godmother does all the work; all she does is go dancing and then puts on a shoe.

Bad Things: Scandalous clothing, runs away from home, marries a hooligan from the streets, kind of snotty, "A Whole New World" (if you would like an explanation of this reason I will tell you in person)
Good Things: She owns a tiger.

Ariel is a hoarder. (Who needs twenty thing-a-ma-bobs?) She is also half-fish, half-skank. She sells her soul to the devil. She runs away from home. She brushes her hair with a fork. She is kind of a stalker. Her best friends are a fish, a seagull, and a crab. However, I like her spunk. She knows what she wants and goes for it, which I actually like a lot, even if I don't approve of her methods.

Did you know that Giselle is not one of the official Disney Princesses? She was going to be until Disney realized that they would have to pay Amy Adams royalties for using her likeness. Interesting, right? But I think of her as one, so she makes the list. I really love Amy Adams. A lot. And I think that's why I like Giselle so much. She starts off like the cliched damsel in distress, but ends up saving her true love herself. (Question: Patrick Dempsey or James Marsden? I am so conflicted as to who I like more.) 

Or "tee-Hana" as my good friend Brighty calls her. She works really hard and is so focused on her goals, which I admire. But she also shoves off important aspects of being a human being, like love and friendship, to do it. However, she is super soulful and I LOVE that!!!!!

My #1 favorite Disney song is "Just Around the Riverbend". My #3 favorite Disney song is "Colors of the Wind". That may be why she ranks so high on my list. Because she is kind of scantily clad, she talks to animals that don't talk back AND trees that do (both disturbing and wrong), and she has this magical ability to understand English. But she also has a legitimate relationship with John Smith that goes on throughout the entirety of the film. She jumps off mountains and canoes off waterfalls which is super Bad-A! And she loves her people so much that she let's her love go. Also she has that cool tattoo and says "Wingapo" and is beautiful and is in-tune with nature and stops a war.

She does run away from home and lies in order to join an army where she earns everyone's trust under false pretenses, BUT she does it to save her father. Also, she kicks butt and has a dragon. 'Nuff said.

Top Five Reasons Why I Like Rapunzel SO Much:
5) Her main goal in life is not to find a man. True, it is just to go see some lights, but still....
4) The music is SO good! One of my favorite soundtracks ever.
3) She has some attitude. Not too much, but enough to make her really cool.
2) She saves the day, and is the magic, and is capable of doing things for herself (for the most part)
1) Flynn Rider a.k.a Eugene Fitzherbert a.k.a ZACHARY LEVI a.k.a My Ultimate Celebrity Crush

Belle is my all-time favorite Disney Princess because
-She reads. A lot.
-She has brown hair and brown eyes.
-She is somewhat of an outsider, despite being very beautiful.
-She wants "adventure in the great, wide somewhere". Not a diamond.
-She sacrifices her future because she loves her father more.
-She is clever and headstrong, but still friendly and caring.
-She is a teacher. (remember when she teaches the Beast to read?)
-She falls in love with the Beast because of who he is not what he looks like.

But mostly I think I like her because I relate to her the most.


  1. James Marsden. Cuz of this:

    Hilarious ranking! I'd have to say Rapunzel's my favorite, but Belle is definitely up there.

  2. james marsden. those eyes just kill me.
    belle is my favorite as well. just cuz.

  3. I definitely agree with your top 3 ladies, though I might sneak Mulan up to the front. Everything she does is for her family and country. Freakin' Bad-A. I switch back and forth between her and Belle, though, so next week I might like Belle the most. Who knows? James Marsden does. Because he's divine.